Paw Prints and Angels
Mickey Anne Maddox Phillips (Annie Girl)
October 13, 2001 – December 17, 2014
Annie Girl is now running with the angels however her paw prints will forever be right beside mine, and on my heart. She will always be a part of everything I do because she is a part of everything I am.
She taught me how to love unconditionally. She taught me how to be a wife and a mom. You see Annie Girl was the first one who really needed me. There was no back up plan. She was relying solely on me to feed her, walk her, love her, take care of her, meet her every need. And to do it all expecting nothing in return, other than maybe a snuggle! Looking back, I know God gave her to me so I would be ready when he bought my husband into my life. I would be ready to love him not because I wanted to be loved but because I wanted to love him. I would be ready to be a mom. I would be ready to give 110% of myself, even when exhausted and overwhelmed.
She taught me to run. And to enjoy it! To sprint at times and to slow down at other times to explore the world around us. Her pace was a perfect balance. Sprint…explore…sprint…explore…sprint…snuggle!
She wiped away many tears and celebrated many joyous moments. She had a great happy dance we did on Friday afternoons. She is in my bridal portraits! She loved the beach, the greenway, and Grandma and Grandpa’s house. She carefully navigated floors covered in legos, cars, and blocks with admirable skill. She never cried over spilled milk, or anything else…just happily consumed it! She was a patient and loving big sister. The moments between her and our son are my most treasured. She was my ever-present shadow, rarely more than a foot away. She kept a lot of secrets…thankfully! She was always gentle and loving. Always.
One of Annie Girls favorite things to do was snuggle which we usually did while watching a good chick flick. We spent the majority of her last week cuddled together watching Christmas movies. I am so thankful for that special time with her. In the quite moments of the nights when the rest of the house was asleep, I was able to hold her, comfort her, and say goodbye.
I won’t admit to the number of times we watched “The Prince and Me” over the years but I’m sure that looking down from heaven she can finish this quote after hearing only the first few words.
“Today marks a profound and bittersweet milestone for all of us, as we bear witness to both an end and a beginning. And while we must continue on, we must also be grateful to have been blessed with someone who has so ably guided us to where we are today. When there has been so much love and happiness for someone, it is natural to be reluctant to close such a wonderful chapter in our lives, for moving forward is rarely accomplished without considerable grief and sadness. And while our sorrow may be profound, the clouds will clear, and the sun will shine on us again. And in that warm, bright light we will find ourselves facing a glorious future. A future of exciting challenges and infinite possibilities, in which the horizon will stretch out before us, trimmed in the heavenly glow of the sunrise of our tomorrow.”
These words have been bouncing around in my head the last couple of weeks. While the hole in my heart and my life is unbearable right now, I know there will come a time when my heart grows bigger and allows room for another furry friend. I am confident it will be someone God and Annie Girl pick out just for us, to pick up where she left off raising her family.